Sunday, June 6, 2010

I Needed A Kick In The Ass

Ok, forget the hiatus.  I had a phone conversation earlier that put things in perspective a bit.

Here's the back story.  Brooke is dating Jen again.  Oh yeah, she went back to the psycho.  I'm completely heart broken...blah blah blah.  BUT if I shut down, then I am letting her win.  And I will be fucking damned if I let her control my life.  I'll still be around, spewing my craziness (with a southern accent of course).  But no matter what, I am here...and I do matter.  Whether or not certain people recognize that appropriately, I'm not going away.

It seemed easier to hide in a hole, or drink myself into a stupor, but I'm not really one to just roll over and let life just happen to me.  I had two days of self pity, and I'm over it.  So screw you Jen and your manipulative ways, screw you "depressed me" that didn't want to get out of bed, and screw you cable for not having anything on that I want to watch right now.  But thank you Blogger for introducing me to some really amazing people. 

And Brooke, if you ever happen across this page I hope you know what you gave up yesterday.  I know that probably sounds angry and cocky.  But that's what I feel.  And what's the point of a blog if you're going to sugarcoat shit?

Welcome to the flip side.


Tammie said...

the flip side seems like an awesome place to be. :)

im sorry about the brooke thing. i had really hoped that wouldnt happen again. but i also think that it seems like brooke really has no idea what (or who) she wants out of life. as much as i feel sorry for you, i strangely enough feel sorry for her even more. she just doesnt have it together and she seems like someone who may always have turmoil in her life. (of course im basing this only on what you've said here, so please correct me if im wrong.) anyway, you dont need that kind of drama.

keep on rockin' the flip side. :)

Tammie said...

oh, and seriously there is jack shit on tv right now. i just watched a movie on the lifetime movie network-that alone should give you an idea of what im dealing with on the tube today-anyway, it was about a demonic baby trying to kill its mom.

R.H. Ducky said...

tammie ~ as always you're pretty spot on. at first i felt sorry for myself in this situation...but the more i think about the more i see that brooke has the worst of it. i mean, she has to deal with jen. granted, that is by her own choice, but still that can't possibly be fun. i'm going to do my best to move on and live my life...and whether or not i agree with her choices, i do wish her the very best. i mean, i do love her, and ultimately i just want her to be happy.

R.H. Ducky said...

and you're right about the tv thing. i wonder sometimes why i pay for cable. until i see twilight on starz or showtime or whatever...then i smile ;)

and yes, the flip side is good.

margg. said...

oh dear.
so intense.

Margaret (Peggy or Peg too) said... that's the Ducky I know and Love!! I'm proud of you because you are so worth it, cute southern accent and all !!!

R.H. Ducky said...

margg: how was your birthday? amazing as you predicted, i hope.

peggy: thanks for the chat are super duper awesome!

Raquel's World said...

Wow that was quick for me. I just read ten seconds ago that you were on hiatus (behind on reading my blogs). It was quite sad to me b/c you were my first follower. But now you're back. Glad you bounced back so quickly. Keep your head up! And look if you get too depressed again, let me know b/c I can share a view into my life that will make you feel quite grateful.:)

R.H. Ducky said...

raquel ~ my hiatus lasted less than 24 hours i think. lol. mama bear, peggy wouldn't let me wallow in self-pity for too long...bless her heart.